Along with this new-found independence I wrote about in my last post, our spirited little bear also wants to make a lot of her own decisions. Especially, again, when it comes to her socks. She NEVER wants them to match. When her dad gets her dressed, she comes out of the room wearing three hair bands and 2 barrettes.
The OCD in me has to grin and bear it because who am I to tell her she’s wrong? Unless of course we’re dressing up for an occasion. She doesn’t make all the rules! But I love that she’s using her imagination in her own funky little way.
And while we’re on the topic of OCD…. Just a touch… I like everything in its correct place. Cupboard and closet doors shut, shoes in a row, nothing off kilter. My husband laughs every time we sit down to watch TV because it takes 5 minutes for me to get the room in shape before I can relax. So let’s not even talk about the play-doh. OMG the play-doh. You aren’t supposed to mix the colours!!! Blue is smushed into yellow, white and red are all crumbled together…oh it drives me nuts! But…it’s not my play-doh. She can mix it if she wants too.
So, for someone who’s bossy and likes to be in control — of everything– I need to learn to let it go. Choose my battles. A great piece of advice from my favourite parenting book (no, not Mom’s Who Drink and Swear, that’s my second favourite parenting book) Happiest Toddler on the Block, is that I am not actually her boss. I’m more like her ambassador, here to guide her and help make smart decisions (ok, ultimately I am “the boss” but that doesn’t mean being bossy all the time and if I play it under the guise of ambassador, we’re going to get along a lot better). They don’t have to be MY decisions, they just have to be safe decisions.
I can’t even begin to imagine the battle of the wills we’ll have to endure in the teenage years. At least for now a little bribery goes a long way when I really want it my way. I think that could get pretty expensive when they’re older…